Friday, April 28, 2006

Un-American

Remember -- we said we would have guest blobbers. Well our dear friend Clay Greager (The Key Wester) has offered up a tasty morsel.
It’s Un-American

Many years ago after suffering the pain and agony of having a cup of coffee spill on my lap because I swerved to miss one of our beloved chickens here in Key West that I adopted a policy of grabbing my morning coffee at the Dunkin Donuts, which is on the way from the parking lot to my office.

This morning while a double-timed from the parking lot, (I really need my coffee) I found the Dunkin Donuts closed. They never closed and I was set back for a moment or two. They had pasted a sign in the window stating that they had some equipment failures and would re-open shortly. I was in a near panic and gave in to walking the two blocks to the new Starbucks. I don’t like Starbucks; I associate those who drink that designer coffee with everything that is wrong with this country. Anyway as I approached the shop there was several people standing outside and I thought; damn, now I even will have to wait in line.” But no, they were also closed and they also had the same sign explaining why. Equipment failure.

I knew then that this was some kind of terrorism attack on our country. We just can’t operate without our coffee. As I walked slowly back to my store I only hoped they don’t attack the brewery’s next. Take away my coffee, take away my beer and this is no longer the country I fought for and love.

Yes I do have a coffee pot in my office, one of those one plus one’s but even that chore is burdensome to me. Besides those little pods of “Good Morning Coffee” have been lying around for almost two years and I could only imagine what they would taste like.

I called my son and asked him if his restaurant had any coffee brewing this early in the morning. They don’t open until noon and it was still not 7:00 am. He said they normally do but his workers didn’t show up this morning. I asked him, what in the hell is going on? His reply was simple and all encompassing, “Dad, INS is in town and they’re rounding up all the illegal!” He even added that the rumor is that over 2,000 employee’s haven’t shown up for work. Hotels, bars, tee shirt shops, restaurants and fish cutters all disappearing like as though some other aliens from outer space (they have immunity from INS) have arrived and took them away.

So as I sit here drinking something that at least resembles coffee I’m contemplating on who should receive my wrath at this oh so wrong program of denying me my rights as an American. At first I was going to attack the INS, but then they are only doing their jobs. Then I was going to attack our government but they have laws that have to be obeyed. Even so I normally run into the same two Customs and Immigrations Officers at the Dunkin Donuts and always wonder what they are thinking when they order their coffee from the girls from Bulgaria. I’ll bet they are even pissed because now they are out of their morning brew also.

After a while I finally decided who was to blame. It’s wasn’t the INS, it wasn’t our government, it wasn’t any of those political bodies, It was Dunkin Donuts. Why is it that they bring these undocumented employees, pay them a minimum wage, (which by the way they have to pay their brokers a dollar an hour out of their meager wages, it’s all part of the package.)

So as not to beleaguer you with much more I only have to say this, the corporate officers at Dunkin Donuts who not only allow this program but also have arranged for it should be arrested and tried for treason. They are just Un-American! ...We're Just Sayin.

7 comments:

Iris and David said...

Oh NO! Talk about split allegiance: Last year, after months of searching and the occasional unanswered query from someone working the counter, I determined that the Dunkin Donuts organization had been bought by Pernod Ricard ( a French conglomerate whose fortunes were born from the sipping of milky liquorice flavored aperatifs). Well. I like Clay. love the Dunkster. Great coffee, and the espresso drinks tend to be about a buck a pop less than Starbucks and Cie. And, depending on who is working the counter, you can practice your Spanish, your Russian, your Houssa (yes there are Maliennes working there too) as you ask for your Boston Creme and double decaf latte. Well, I bought a few shares of the Pernod company just to be able, for once to OWN a piece of a company I like. Now, to see they are falling off the efficiency wagon in Key West: well, we may have to confer a board meeting and see what's to be done. The coffee fuels too much, including the trade of workers who parade in and out of the DD halls. We know a guy from Tobago who was working at a DD in Northern Virginia. Worked his bagels off. Became a manager: (He must be good at all those languages, too.) Now, the whole house of cards ( or.. house of cake blueberrys with a slather of frosting) is at risk. We can't seem to do much about Iraq, Oil, balance of payments or Katrina Clean up. But for hell's sake, lets get the JAVA brewing, and get on with it. We're just Sayin'
David

Walt said...

Well other than the Seneca and all the other indigenous groups that came acros the land bridge from Asia and who offer us casino gambling on "their" land, we're all un-American.

See my Venezuelian Grandmother and my Irish Grandfather made my dad. He tells me the boys in school uses to call him a SpicMick.

Then my Lithuanian Grandmother and my French / Prussian Grandfather made my mom. She never said if anyone said anything bad about her other than mispronouncing her last name.

Which brings us to me, a truly un-American. But I do enjoy how the Seneca play "Snowsnake." They gave me an honorary Seneca name that translates to "Big Foot." Fitting, even though it's hard to find shoes that fit.

Dunkin' Donuts does make a mighty fine cup of Joe. Not an average Joe. I once asked my friend Joe if he were offended by that phrase. Said he never thought about it till I brought it up.

Now, what was I saying?

Marilynn said...

David
Great well written pieces. I'll keep checking in. I was hoping to see some of your pictures, though!
To get to my other blog, go to the user profile link. Also, look back a month or so to find the grand opening party of Jeff's bike store.
Marilynn

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