Give Me My Stephano

After the rain stopped I decided it was time to get out of bed and go out do some errands. I pulled myself away from Olympic bliss, put myself together and went down to the lobby. There were still more than a few clouds, and the doorman warned that it might storm again. It made me nervous enough to hike back to the apartment to get an umbrella. By the time I got back downstairs it was raining again. The kind of hard where the umbrellas turn inside out and you just get soaked. Discouraged yet hopeful, I went back upstairs hoping for synchronized swim but alas, all I found was “Day of Our Lives”. Breaking news! NBC does not preempt the soaps for the Olympics. Of course they don’t. What would the fans do if they couldn’t get a healthy dose of Stephano Demara.

When we started our business (which we called an access service --it was really a pr firm but we wanted to distinguish ourselves from everyone else), we worked out of my Dupont Circle townhouse. It was a great space. Four floors, 1200 square feet a floor and we used the first floor as the office. Clients loved the uniqueness of the office and we were most comfortable. It was our habit, however, to close the office between 1 and 2 pm, watch “Days of Our Lives”, eat tuna salad on triscuts and talk about the business, social and economic opportunities of the day, – in that order. Watch, eat, chat—sounds like I might have another book. Anyway, we were avid “Days” fans. We would discuss the plot, characters, and developments like we were talking about friends and family. We were obsessed—like all the old ladies we had so often laughed about. And not only were we consumed with every aspect of the story, David would often ask me to bring him up to date on the terrible things Stephano had done. It was pervasive in the days of our own lives.

Imagine my surprise when I thought I would find someone swimming, running, jumping, hitting or twisting in the air, and there he was, Stephano Demara in the hospital, apparently no longer a villain. I dared not watch for very long because I knew I could catch up on the events of the last twenty years and I didn’t want to get hooked – which would happen after just a twenty minutes. And speaking of soap operas. I have changed my mind about John Edwards.

After hours and hours of nauseating reports about the Edwards’ affair, I have to admit I was sick of it. Originally, I did think it was just between husband, wife, and people close to them. But upon reflection, (Isn’t reflection amazing) I have decided that his admission was shameful. If he had the affair in 2006, when did he tell Elizabeth? Did he rush to her side right after he got out of bed with the videographer? Or was it sometime in 2007 after he decided to run for President or after he bought the girlfriend a house. (Yes I know he denied knowing anything about this – and there is a bridge in Brooklyn for sale.) He clearly knew that he had an affair (he’s not suffering from memory loss), and it might come out. No one, not even a politician is stupid enough to think anything can be kept a secret. Here’s another newsflash, nothing is off the record and there are no secrets anymore. In “So You Think You Can Be President” we advise whomever takes the test that “The repercussions for even a little bitty lie (there will always be someone who knows that you fibbed) will forbid you from even discussing running for any office; including, but not limited to, President, Mayor, a Congressional Seat, any School Boards, or even Green Grocer (no sneers or snickers please, it’s an important place for community interaction).”

Surely this advice is applicable far beyond our humorous incredibly insightful test. How could Edwards have run, knowing how critical this election is, and he would put in jeopardy the possibility of a Democratic win. I am not one of those people who think Hillary would be the nominee if only Edwards had been absent from Iowa. Hillary ran a terrible campaign, used bad judgment, and irritated too many independent voters. But she wasn’t duplicitous in her relationship with the public. And now who knows if any of what he said was really how he felt. If he was willing to perpetrate the hoax of morality, what else did he do or say that was equally dishonest.

So I take it back. I don’t think his confession was unimportant or irrelevant (because he has no political career). He is a selfish, self -serving, son of a bitch, (and I mean this is the nicest possible way) who clearly never cared about the American public or the damage he might have caused. It’s raining again in NY and thankfully, it’s time for Olympic coverage – maybe synchronized diving, no synchronized swim, but no soap operas—except in real life. We’re just sayin...